


I'm not okay (I promise)

by voidstonem



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: A LOT of Angst, Angst, Anxiety, Canon Compliant, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mark to the rescue, One Shot, Sick Character, Sickfic, Vomiting, donghyuck is sick and anxious, donghyuck is struggling, idol life is hard, mark comforts him, markhyuck, mentions of being overworked, nct dream dorm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-31
Updated: 2019-01-31
Packaged: 2019-10-20 03:20:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17614448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/voidstonem/pseuds/voidstonem
Summary: Donghyuck is sick, overwhelmed, and on the brink of an anxiety attack. Luckily, Mark knows how to bring him back down to earth.orMark is quick to notice that Donghyuck is being weighed down by the many stresses of idol life. On top of that, the poor boy has come down with a bad flu. Cue the angst.





	I'm not okay (I promise)

**Author's Note:**

> This came out of nowhere while I was TrYiNg to write new chapters for my other two fics I have in progress. Please enjoy. Also, I am sorry lmao.

Donghyuck feels panicky, and an anxiety attack is the last thing he needs right now.

 _It’ll be fine_ , he thinks, _it’s just a few songs. No need to hyperventilate._

He’s mentally kicking himself because he shouldn’t have let it get this bad. He should’ve told someone about his headache this morning. He should’ve asked Mark for some fever reducers hours ago.

But there’s absolutely nothing he can do about it now because they’re set to perform in less than fifteen minutes, and Donghyuck feels like he’s come down with the worst flu of his life. 

He and the rest of the dreamies only just finished having their makeup done, and everyone’s now draped over the comfy chairs and couches decorating their dressing room. Jisung has his head on Chenle’s shoulder and Jaemin is whispering something to Renjun. Jeno is watching Mark pace back and forth across the dressing room.

_Typical Mark._

They all look somewhat preoccupied, so Donghyuck figures he can sneak to the bathroom without being noticed. 

The moment he shuts the bathroom door behind him, he takes a few deep breaths. The nausea infesting his stomach subsides a bit as he steadies his breathing. Then, Donghyuck twists the faucet on the sink to the coldest setting and lets the freezing water run over his hands. He needs to get his temperature down without smudging his makeup and, frankly, this is the only thing he can think to do. If he can’t get his fever to dwindle, he’ll definitely overheat.

Donghyuck realizes he’s been in the bathroom for nearly five whole minutes, so he turns the sink off and heads back to the dressing room as quickly as he can. Well, as quickly as his aching legs can carry him.

“Ready, hyung?” Jeno is suddenly right beside him. Donghyuck nods and gives the boy a quick smile.

Mark beckons them out of the dressing room and towards the stage, and all Donghyuck can do is pray he doesn’t throw up as soon as he opens his mouth to sing.

Somehow, he gets his wish.

The performance goes relatively smoothly. Donghyuck’s voice cracks once, but he just laughs it off and shoots the audience a grin. He stumbles a bit while dancing to “Go,” but he doesn’t think anyone noticed.

By the time they’re in the van on the way back to the dorm, however, Donghyuck is _suffering._

His body is aching ten times worse than it was before the performance, and the stuffy air in the van is making his stomach churn. 

“Are you okay, Hyuck? You’re awfully quiet,” Mark whispers beside him.

Donghyuck is grateful that Mark is voicing his concern quietly. He really doesn’t want to make a scene in the van.

He considers lying, but at this point, he doesn’t have the energy.

“I’m not feeling very good, hyung,” he ends up saying.

“What’s the matter?” asks Mark, and Donghyuck’s stomach gives a nasty jolt as the wheels of the van roll over a speed bump.

He clenches his mouth shut tightly and gives his head a weak shake. Mark looks at him in confusion for a moment, but then his eyes widen in realization.

“Do you need to throw up? Right now?”

Donghyuck shakes his head once more and courageously opens his mouth to take a deep breath. The nausea subsides ever so slightly, and Donghyuck thinks he _might_ actually be able to make it back to the dorm before he’s violently ill.

Mark gives Donghyuck’s thigh a comforting pat as they pull into the parking lot behind the dorm.

The next couple of minutes blur together. Mark helps him walk inside, and Donghyuck thinks he sees Renjun eyeing them suspiciously before the boy retreats to his room.

Suddenly, he’s being sat down on their couch. Mark is beside him, but the rest of his bandmates are nowhere to be found. Donghyuck figures they sensed his discomfort and decided to give him and Mark some space.

He makes a mental note to thank them when he’s feeling better.

A few seconds later, Mark is holding a glass of water to Donghyuck’s lips and whispering something that sounds a lot like “Maybe you’re just dehydrated.”

He tries to shake his head to let Mark know that he _absolutely cannot_ put anything in his stomach right now, but the action only makes him feel more queasy. 

Donghyuck is on his feet before Mark can stop him, and he somehow is able to sprint to the bathroom without falling down.

He’s eternally grateful that he’s able to to make it to the toilet before he feels something acidic start to creep up his throat. His palms are hot against the tile floor, so _why is he shivering?_

Donghyuck winces when the vomit splashes against the sides of the toilet bowl. He’s not exactly being quiet, and the bathroom door is wide open. He’s sure all of his friends can hear him suffering.

Before he’s able to let the embarrassment of his situation wash over him, he hears the door slam closed followed by the faint click of a lock. Mark has a hand on his back and his touch feels so good, but there’s another wave of nausea crashing against his insides and—

_Fuck._

Mark is _right_ next to him, and Donghyuck _really_ doesn’t want to throw up in front of his best friend.

Or, rather, his _crush._

Unfortunately, his body is not paying much attention to what he does and doesn’t want to do right now. Donghyuck leans forward gags into the toilet again. This time, he tries to turn his head slightly to the left so he can try and spare Mark the undesirable details.

“I think you must’ve caught that flu or something. You know, the one Taeil-hyung had last week,” says Mark softly.

Yeah, he does remember. Taeil had been sick for three days straight. He’d had to miss quite a few dance practices. 

Donghyuck does _not_ have time to be sick right now.

He knows the fans regularly make comments about Mark being overworked because of his participation in all three units, but truthfully, he wishes someone would acknowledge his own struggle. Dream and 127 are both working hard right now, and Donghyuck can’t even remember the last time he got more than four hours of sleep at night.

There’s tears streaming down his cheeks now, and he hopes Mark thinks they’re from the strain of his gagging and not from his emotional anguish.

“You wanna lay down?” Mark asks.

Donghyuck nods, and the action makes his head swim. The nausea has subsided for the time being, but his muscles are aching furiously again. He can even feel a headache forming in his temples from the crying.

He let’s Mark half-carry him out of the bathroom and to his bed. He catches Jeno looking at him pitifully in the hallway, but he chooses to ignore it. 

Mark sits him gently on his bed and _just_ when Donghyuck thinks he’s about to leave him alone, Mark sits down cross-legged beside him. He’s looking at him with those _eyes,_ and Donghyuck senses that Mark can tell exactly what’s going through his mind.

“Hyuck, I don’t know how long you’ve been feeling sick, but you can’t start beating yourself up over this,” says Mark slowly.

Donghyuck just feels so overwhelmed. His body feels like it’s crumbling to pieces and his mind is travelling at a thousand miles per hour. All of his responsibilities are flashing through his head. He knows he’s not the leader of Dream, but he feels like the younger ones look up to him especially since he’s also a part of 127. He wants to be strong for them, but sometimes his anxiety is just _too much._

“I know, hyung, I just _hate_ this,” Donghyuck sniffles, “I’m so tired, hyung.”

“I know, Hyuck, but we’ll get through this together. We’re only human. We’re allowed to get sick, you know.”

Donghyuck sighs and lays back on his pillows.

“Thanks, hyung.”

“No one said being an idol would be easy, but we have to strong. Donghyuck-ah, I know you’re more than strong enough,” says Mark. He stands up and kicks the trash can in the corner of the room over to the bed before flopping back down onto the mattress. He lifts up the covers to curl up beside Donghyuck on his bed, and Donghyuck can hear his heartbeat ringing loudly in his ears.

Mark wraps his arms around Donghyuck’s waist and nuzzles his face against the back of his neck. 

“If you start to feel nauseous again, wake me up. In the meantime, let’s get some rest,” whispers Mark.

Donghyuck’s previously incapacitating anxiety suddenly feels nonexistent, and he can barely feel the pounding in his head. It’s strange how the presence of someone you love can make _everything_ feel extraordinarily better.

“Hyung, I don’t want to get you sick. You know you have a shitty immune system,” Donghyuck teases lightly.

“We’ll just have to be sick together, then,” replies Mark.

Donghyuck thinks he’d be willing to do just about _anything_ , as long as he and Mark are together.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much for actually reading this! Drop some feedback if you want :DD


End file.
